Art is a bang, un!
by Coral Q's bff
Summary: Naruto, the only Genin of the 12, have been sent a mission statement: Find this guy's love of his life! But will he be able to find this guy's soulmate when he has no idea about girls himself? And is this guy really all that he appears to be? DeiNaru!
1. Chapter 1

An: Yay! This is my first fic, so please go easy on me. I've always been a fan of Deinaru, so I wanted to give it a shot. I hope it doesn't go so bad.

Art is bang, un! Chapter one

Once upon a time, in a very cliche time and space, there lived a pitiful family known as Uzumaki Naruto. This family only had one member, and-

"HEY! QUIT MAKING ME SOUND SO PATHETIC!"

Sorry. A certain blond teenage boy got up groaning. "Che! Back in Konoha and already I have to chase that stupid cat." He yawned and repeatedly palmed his mouth all the while. Stretching, he pushed off the soft blankets and got off the bed.

"YOSH! I'm gonna do my very best today!"

From above, a certain crow cried, "Baka. Baka."

* * *

"Mwoar!" cried the cat as it struggled.

"Bwahaha! Another job well done." Naruto held up the struggling cat at an arm's length like a trophy.

"Eh? Naruto-niichan?"

The Genin stopped in his tracks seeing a certain group of Genins. "Oh, hey Konohamaru."

"Don't hey us, Naruto-niichan!" cried Moegi.

"You keep stealing all of our jobs!" complained Udon.

"How are we supposed to get stronger if you keep taking our missions?!" shouted Konohamaru. "It's not fair!"

The older Genin bursted out laughing. "Ahahaha! First come first served."

The younger Genin scowled. "Just you wait, Naruto-niichan! This means war!"

"Okay, okay, sure. Meet me at the ramen stand later for lunch, 'kay?" Naruto grinned as he walked away.

Konohamaru suddenly brightened. "Okay!"

Moegi and Udon stared appalled at their leader.

The Genin looked confused at his comrades. "What?"

Meanwhile, Naruto handed the poor cat to it's owner while inwardly sighing. Isn't there a mission that's worthwhile? One that could tip off of the Akatsuki or Orochimaru maybe? He thought back to the first few weeks. Nothing. Zip. Nada. And the Hokage had forbidden him from even trying to go to investigated trails... Maybe it's enough for him to go off and become a missing-nin and possibly join Akatsuki for some sick twisted fangirl plot? Naw.

Tsunade nodded and stamped the box on Naruto's record, signifying the mission as a success. "Well done, Uzumaki Naruto."

"Ne, Tsunade-baachan! Can't I have a better mission?"

"What? But you're practically done for the day, why don't you just relax and settle down?"

Naruto snickered. "Already you're talking like an old woman."

"Urusai!"

Naruto screeched as a chair was thrown in his face.

Tsunade huffed and walked over to the fallen teen. "So, you want a mission, eh?"

"Y-yeah. Pretty much. Ow."

Tsunade sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. She looked to the ceiling. "I suppose it can't be helped. Another mission then."

"B-rank?!"

"Don't be stupid. C!"

Naruto's hopes were crushed as glass does when shattered by explosions. "Waaah!"

"That's the most I'm giving you."

The blond pouted. "But, but-!"

"No buts!"

"Everyone else is doing something but me-!" cried the teen. "Come on-!" Inwardly he groaned. _'I can't believe I have to do this much butt-kissing, dattebayo._'

Tsunade twitched. "Just be thankful with what you have and deal with it!"

Naruto was handed the mission statement. "Huh?"

"You must help this poor man find his soulmate."

"EEH?!"

* * *

Naruto twitched. "Ha... So your name's Deina?"

"Un."

"And you need to find your soulmate?"

"Un."

"Well that's easy, why don't you take off your hat and just talk? No girl would want to talk to a guy with his face covered."

"Un?"

"I mean, chicks dig it for a while, but then sooner or later, if you don't show, they won't go. Eh? You're writing this down?" Naruto asked noticing the brown cloaked man whose face was covered by a huge straw hat taking out a pen and notepad.

"Un!"

Naruto twitched some more. He didn't know what's worse. The fact that he says "un" the entire time or the fact that this guy's name is "Deina".

"Ehe. Well, Deina? Aren't you going to take it off?"

"Un!" Deina sputtered shaking his head rapidly.

"Nani?! Come on! Just get it off!" Naruto lunged at the man, only to fall on the table and trip over with the table.

Ouch.

Deina peered over the blond worried. "Un?"

"I'm fine." Naruto said annoyed. He got up and shook his head. "Okay. Fine, keep the hat if you want to. Don't get my help. You obviously don't need me." Naruto snickered at his own brilliant tactic. The guy is certain to cooperate with him then! But turning around, he found the guy humming while cleaning his ear.

"EH?! Don't you even care at all?!"

"Un." The man shook his head away and continued his air of arrogance.

Naruto growled. "That's it..." Grabbing the guy's brown cloak, he yanked the man out of the building. (random building, ole!) Not caring for the poor guy, he shouted defiantly, "I'm gonna get you your soulmate whether you like it or not! It's my mission, and I'm going to accomplish it! DATTEBAYO!"

"Uuuuuun!" cried the poor guy.

Everyone else in the streets just stared not knowing what to make of the sight.

* * *

The Genin sighed sitting at the edge of his couch. "So you don't live in a home?"

"Un." Deina nodded and pointed to a hotel.

"And you live in a hotel room?"

"Un." Another nod.

"How's that going to attract any girls?!" Naruto shouted shaking the man senseless.

"UuUuUuuUUUUuuUUUnnnNnN!" cried poor Deina. He waved his arms wildly in protest.

"Augh! Forget this! I'm going out for a bit. You stay here. I'm not done with this mission yet." Naruto pointed straight at the guy's hidden face as a threat and left the apartment.

"Deina" sighed and pulled off his hat, revealing golden locks covering half his face and a large ponytail. He swished his bishie head chuckling. "If the Akatsuki found out that I had to act as annoying as Tobi in order to gain anyone's trust, I don't know what they'll do." He snickered thinking about Sasori's possible reaction. "Too bad Tobi's filling in for me at the moment, un."

* * *

"Sasori-sempaaaaiii! Tobi's tired!" Tobi cried tears running down the one hole in his orange spiral mask.

A harsh growl came from Sasori from within Hiruko. He just had to get stuck with the most annoying of partners, doesn't he?

"Sasori-sempaaaaiiii!" The klutzy Akatsuki-member-to-be whined.

"Shut up. We were supposed to get the one tailed racoon, but you screwed up the first round. Now Sunagakure's on the lookout more than ever, so stop complaining." Sasori snarled.

To which he was answered with more whining. "But it's hoooot!"

Sasori narrowed his eyes from within. _'Deidara better hurry with that stupid jinchuuriki!_'


	2. Chapter 2

An: Second chapter! YAY! Oh yeah, I forgot the disclaimer on the first chapter, I don't own Naruto. I'd like to thank **Nikushimi no Ai** and **La-Avenger** for their reviews! You guys are so wonderful, un!

Art is a bang, un! Chapter 2

"And all he ever said to me was un, un, UN! That's all he ever says! How am I supposed to find him a date?!" Naruto shouted angrilly to Shikamaru and Chouji.

The lazy nin sighed. "Well, can't say you're any different. What with you saying 'dattebayo' all the time."

Naruto quickly defended himself, "Dattebayo is my signature cool phrase! What I don't get is 'un'!"

Shikamaru heaved a huge sigh.

Chouji looked up from his baked snacks and said idly, "Did you ask what he's looking for in a woman?"

At that, Naruto grew quiet. "What did you say?"

"I said-" The Akimichi was shocked seeing Naruto suddenly in his face. "Eh?!"

"Chouji! You're a genius!" Naruto yelled. The blond Genin turned scowling at Shikamaru. "And you're supposed to be smart!" He then hopped off. "Yosh! I'm gonna tackle this mission down."

Shikamaru stared at Chouji.

The Akimichi grinned while stuffing his face some more. "Wow. I'm a genius."

"Don't start, Chouji."

* * *

Naruto ran back to his apartment grinning widely. _'As soon as I know what kind of girl he likes, I'm bound to find somebody!_' He snickered thinking of his plan in full throttle. _'I'll finish my mission and then with my success... Oh I can picture it now_.'

-----Naruto's Inner Theater-----

_"Eh?! Uzumaki Naruto?!"_

_"S-so amazing! Naruto's so strong!"_

_Naruto scoffed as Tsunade reluctantly bowed and gave the Hokage hat._

_"P-please sir! Have pity on me!"_

_Naruto placed the hat on scowling. "Peh! You're lucky that I like you, baa-chan, otherwise I would have kicked you out by now."_

_"Yes Hokage-sama!" Tsunade cried bowing more._

_Naruto grinned at the rest of his peers._

_"All hail Uzumaki Naruto!"_

_And with that, they bowwed._

_Suddenly the door opened revealing..._

_"Sasuke?!" Naruto cried surprised._

_"I heard that you've become Hokage... And I had to see for myself... Naruto... Please forgive me!" cried the former nukenin as he fell down weeping._

_Naruto reached over and pulled Sasuke up. "Hey, no need for that. You realize your mistake now. It's okay. It's over."_

_Sasuke's eyes widened. "Naruto..." Then he bursted into tears once more. "I'm not worthy to be called cool!"_

_All the rest began sobbing with him._

_"He's such a valient leader!" Shikamaru cried._

_"We shouldn't have made fun of him to begin with!" Neji wiped away his tears._

_"I should have passed him a long time ago!" cried Iruka._

_Kakashi sniffed. "I knew he was stronger than me... I didn't have the guts to admit it!" He bursted into heavy tears. "I'm not worthy of being called a Jounin!"_

_"There there, Kakashi-sensei! We understand!" cried a Chuunin. "All hail Uzumaki Naruto! The 6th Hokage!"_

-----End Naruto's Inner Theater-----

Naruto snickered. "Suh-weet!" He opened the door and stepped in, only to find his foot in contact with something soft.

Within the next few minutes, a huge **"UUUNNN!"** was heard.

* * *

"For the last time, I'm sorry!" Naruto shouted exasperated.

"Un." Deina turned his head away with a huff.

"You're not going to forgive me?"

"Un."

"Well, I don't care. We're going to find you your date! Okay. So... How old are you?" Naruto asked sitting in the secretary position while wearing glasses from nowhere.

"Un."

"That's not an answer, Deina. Now tell me."

"Un." Deina pulled at a clipboard, scribbled on it, and handed it back.

_'It's impolite to ask anyone their age._'

Naruto stared.

Deina then retook the clipboard, scribbled some more, and handed it back.

_'Un._'

"KISAMA!!" Naruto raged. "How am I supposed to find someone for you that's your age?!"

Deina winced and covered his ears. "Un!"

"Don't cover your ears on me!" Naruto yelled louder bamming the table with his fist.

"Un!" Deina shook his head.

"Then what the heck are you doing?!"

"Un..." whined Deina pathetically.

Naruto grew quiet for a moment. He gazed at the man who pointed at the note in front of him.

_'You're too loud!_'

Naruto puffed up his face similar to an upset Jigglypuff. "And you're so dense!" He sighed. "Fine. Let's try this again." The blond spent the next hour writing a huge survey for the other. Every inch of lead stroked across the paper with precision and the boy even had to admit to himself, "Hey... This even looks neater than my regular handwriting! Ne, Deina! Survey-time!" He called out in glee, only to fall short. He did pay attention to where the guy was, right? "D-don't tell me he left!" He panicked searching everywhere.

The bedroom.

No.

The dining room.

No.

The bathroom?

Hell no!

"Augh! I could see it now!" Naruto cried.

-----Naruto's inner theater-----

_"All hail the great Uzumaki Naruto! The 6th Hokage!"_

_Everyone bowed to the blond as he grinned wide. But then something was wrong._

_"The 6th Hokage has never failed a mission before right? He accomplished something no other ninja could do!" whispered one girl._

_"But wait! Naruto-Hokage! What can you tell us about that mission where you had to find the man his dream girl?"_

_Naruto sweatdropped. "W-Well..."_

_"IT'S FAKE! HE'S A LIAR! THE GUY RAN OFF!"_

_"W-wait a minute! I can explain!"_

_"AND YOU COULDN'T FIND HIM?! WHAT KIND OF HOKAGE ARE YOU?!"_

_Tomatoes were thrown as people yelled in an uproar._

_"De-thrown U-zu-maki! De-thrown U-zu-maki!" They chanted._

_"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-!"_

-----End Naruto's Inner Theater-----

Naruto whimpered. "And I've only just become Hokage..." Unbeknownst to him, "Deina" was actually on the roof talking to a certain "Leader-sama".

* * *

"It's going to take longer than expected, un."

**'Are you sure, Deidara?'**

"Yeah. Tell Sasori-danna I'm sorry, un. He'll have to bear with Tobi just a little longer."

**'I hope you know what you're doing, Deidara. If the job proves difficult, I could assign Itachi.'**

"I'll get it done! I just need time, hmph."

**'Very well. It's all up to you.'**

"You won't be disappointed, Leader-sama." Deidara then shut off the link just as he heard Naruto's crying wail. He rolled his eyes. This was one very whiny jinchuuriki. Slipping back on his hat, he teetered for a moment before becoming "Deina" and slipping back inside the attic.

At that moment, Naruto slammed open the door and rushed to the guy glomping him. "Deina!!! I found you!!!"

"Un!" cried Deina happily.

Naruto then pounded the poor guy's head. "Baka! I looked everywhere for you, dattebayo!"

"Uuun, un un un..." Deina whimpered as he clutched his head.

The blond Genin then sighed. "Okay, let's go."

"Un?" Deina tilted his head.

Naruto grumbled under his breath about idiots and declared, "We're going to find you a girl!"

Deina shook his head and pointed at the clock. "Un."

Naruto blinked. "9 pm? What about it?"

"Un." Deina clapped his hands together and placed them against his own face while rubbing it.

"WHAT?! That's your bedtime?!"

"Un..." Deina yawned and fell forward on the ground.

"Hey, Hey! Wait! You can't sleep here!" Naruto yelled.

But the guy paid no attention and began to drift off to sleep on the ground.

Naruto twitched a whole lot. "Hmph!" He sighed gazing out the window. Indeed the sun was already set and it was dark. The moonlight shined through luminating the attic room. Naruto then gazed outside. Stars clustered in celestial constellations spread across the sky like a neverending ocean. Naruto raised his hand a bit. What's it like to reach the stars? Those shining lights that seems far reaching. Stretched out in eternity. He sighed gazing at them and blinked in shock as a white light quickly flashed pass in the sky.

_'A shooting star!_' Bowing his head as though in prayer, he began to wish... Until his head grew heavy and he fell in a tired heap on the ground.

"Deina" opened his eyes and pulled off his hat. He approached the sleeping boy and bent down. He narrowed his seeable eye. "How easy it will be to just take you right now, un... But there's high security, even at night." He gathered up the boy and walked out to Naruto's bedroom. _'Oof. He's a little heavy._' Adjusting a bit, Deidara brought Naruto to the plain bed and tucked him in. He gazed at the jinchuuriki for a while. "So... You've always wondered what's it to ride the stars?" The dark blue eye softened a bit before growing dark.

"Too bad I'll have to complete **my** mission... Un."


	3. Chapter 3

An: Oh wow! I've had so many reviews that I'm shocked. Thanks **the evil sound ninja**, **demonturtle**, **Nikki Mustang**, **fifth Cruxis Angel**, **Sorrowflame, Shadow Kitsune67, KitsuneNaru, XxHunter The One and OnlyxX, **and **Silver of the Moon**!

Edit: I didn't realize that the anonymous reviews weren't enabled. But now it is! Please send me your thoughts! And I'm sorry for taking so long to update.

Art is a bang, un! Chapter Three

Naruto woke up the next morning to find himself in his bed. His initial reaction? Shock. _'Huh? Wasn't I in the attic before?_' He got out of bed shaking his head. _'Where's Deina?_' He looked down at his coffee table to find a note. "Huh? What's this?" Picking the note up, he began to read.

_'You seemed really tired, so I went home..._'

The blond noticed the little post-it tag stuck below it.

_'Un._'

It took all to just supress all the anger bottled up in him. _'Calm down, Naruto... Just go out and find him in his hotel room._' Shaking his head a bit, he took off the pajamas and dressed quickly. _'A mission... This one mission is tough... But if I want to be Hokage... I have to beat this!_'

* * *

"Deina" was having the best dream ever. Oh yeah, not only was Itachi out of the picture, he actually convinced everyone that art really was a bang, ESPECIALLY Sasori-danna! Everyone began to worship him, even as the biggest blast began to-

**"DEINA!!! WAKE UUUUPPP!!!!"**

Deina jolted out of sleep just as Naruto rushed in. Quickly remembering that he was in "Deina" mode, he pathetically cried out, "Un?"

"We've got a big day ahead of us so get ready!" Naruto opened the curtains, letting the sunlight leak in.

Deina yanked the blankets over himself in an attempt to block out the sinister light. "Un."

"Come on, Deina! Don't. Be. Stubborn!" Naruto yanked with every word of the sentences. With one final tug, he succeeded in taking the sheets off with the addition of having Deina fall to the ground.

"Un!" wailed the poor man mourning for the blankets that kept him warm.

Naruto then stared noticing Deina real closely. "Deina... You wear the same clothes to bed?"

Deina bobbed his head up and down happily. "Un!"

"What? That's nothing to be proud of! How's any girl going to go for a guy that sleeps in clothes he sweated in?!" Naruto yelled dragging Deina. "Come on! We're eating breakfast!"

* * *

So upon eating pancakes that were given via roomservice, Naruto began to discuss what they were going to do.

"First, we find out what type of girls appeal to you. Since you wouldn't go out yesterday night, and you have your stupid curfew, dates at night won't do too well. Okay... Complete this survey, Deina."

"Un!" Deina nodded serious and looked at the survey. He tilted his head at the paper. And stared. And stared. And _stared_. He stared until his neck began to hurt and Naruto grew exasperated.

"What is it, Deina?" He asked peering over the guy's shoulder.

"Un." Deina pointed confused at the top of the survey.

"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO PUT WHERE IT SAYS NAME?!" Naruto yelled angrilly. He stopped seeing Deina quiver. A feeling of guilt washed over him as he heard a pathetic whimper coming from Deina. The Genin sighed. He needed a break. "Ne Deina, just go on to the first problem."

"Un!" Deina cheered up and began writing down with relish.

Naruto's jaw dropped as Deina handed him the paper in less than 2 seconds! "Guh... So fast!"

Deina inwardly snickered.

The blond then looked over the paper. "Hah... So all this sums up for your girl to be someone who is energetic, gets along with people, cute yet at the same time understanding and strong! Alright! We got something!" Naruto cheered.

Deina raised his arms and cheered along. "Uun!"

"Now let's see... Someone who gets along with people and is cute... I know!" Naruto declared as he dragged Deina out of the hotel.

* * *

Tenten stared at the strange person in front of her. "Ha... So your name is Deina?"

The guy nodded his head. "Un!"

The kunoichi blinked for a moment at the comment. She then looked back and forth around the cafe. Apparently, she was supposed to meet a hot stud who was interested in her, but while she's waiting, she may as well **converse with someone, right**?** Even though that person may not be socially inclined?**

"Hah... And just when did you come to Konoha?" She asked.

"Un." answered Deina.

"Um... What are your interests?"

"Un."

"Do you have anything you like about Konoha?"

"Un."

"So, what are they?"

"Un."

"Do you think the new Hokage's great?"

"Un."

"Eh... I'm going to leave now."

"Un, un!" waved Deina cheerfully as Tenten stood to leave.

From outside stood Naruto anxious to find out the results. He heaved a cry of surprise seeing Tenten OUTSIDE the cafe! "Tenten! What are you doing?!"

The kunoichi frowned at Naruto. "This guy stood me up and kept me waiting! There's no way I'm going out with him if he thinks I'm going to be willing to wait this long! At this rate, I'll be an old lady! In any case, can you tell that guy I said thanks? He really was great company while I waited."

Naruto glanced in to where Tenten was pointing. "EH?! But that's-!" He looked to where Tenten was standing right next to him, only to find she was gone! "Wait! Tenten!" The Genin looked around, only to find no one. "Darn it!" He stomped right inside. The Genin gazed around the cafe and noticed a certain guy that wore a huge brown cloak and a large straw hat. He glared and stomped right on over to deliver a huge WHACK!

"Un!" cried Deina in pain. Whipping around, he saw Naruto. And he looks mad.

"Deina! What did I tell you to do?!"

"Un!"

"Tenten was supposed to be your date! What did you guys talk about?!"

"Un!"

"What?!"

"Un!"

"You're kidding me!"

"Un!"

"Stop saying un, dattebayo!!!" Naruto screamed in extreme anger. He calmed and then said, "Deina. Did you even like Tenten?"

Deina shook his head.

Naruto placed his hands on his hips. "Then who do you like?"

Deina pondered for a moment and then gestured for Naruto to lean his head closer.

Naruto leaned in with confusion in his big blue eyes. "Eh?"

Automatically, Deina's hand shot out, got Naruto's shirt, pulled him close, and from inside the hat, the unseen Deina gave Naruto a huge kiss. "UUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNN-!" Smack! Deina broke off the kiss giggling and ran off.

The blond Genin stared off in the distance. One half an hour later, Naruto said in horror, "Did he just kiss me?"

* * *

And there you have it! What's Naruto going to do now? What about Sasori and Tobi? Will Naruto ever get "Deina" his soulmate? Please review and I'll try to get the next chapter in!


	4. Chapter 4

Coral: I'm sorry for not updating sooner, but I've been busy and a bit concentrated on working on my new fic before this, so yeah. Anyway, I hope that there's no hatred for me... Much.

To **Tayuya-Chibi**, Yeah! Go Deina and Naruto! XD Oh wow! The smileys are so cute! **anime-freak**, Well, it's updated now! Sorry for the wait... **XxHunter The One and OnlyxX**, Oh heck yeah. He knows... But he doesn't know! XD Hahaha! **Gone and forgoten**., yup. Poor confused, unaware Naruto. X3 **ddd **Thank you! **uat**, thanks! I try. I truly do. **shadowiscool28**Yes, they are, un! **Nikki Mustang**, Thank you very much, un! Hope you'll enjoy this chapter, un! **Princess Teah**, Oh thank you! I love DeiNaru too! One of the most adowable couples! Sadly there just isn't enough (for me)**KitsuneNaru**, IT'S UPDATED!! YAAAH! And **XxDeiNaruIsWonderfulxX**, I'm really sorry for not responding so soon, but I've recently been busy with other things lately. But I'm really glad that you like this fic so much! I wasn't so sure at first if it's alright, but reviewers like you keep me inspired. **EBIL DUSTBUNNY OF DOOOOM**, Thank you very much for your review. I'm sorry I didn't reply, but I had alot to do. **melissaaax3**, Indeed, "Deina" is incapable of speaking other than the language of UN! Here's the update!

Disclaim: No own. Kishi does. 83

Coral: Say thank you Deina!

Deina (CoughDeidaracough): Un! (waves)

Naruto: After all this, I should have a hefty salary. 3X

Coral: Okay guys? This story might contain vast proportions of seriousness, so don't be too ready to laugh.

Art is a Bang, un! Chapter 4!

Naruto screamed in fury as he ran left and right. "Where is he?! Where is that guy, dattebayo?!"

People from down the light yelped and screeched, holding onto whatever they could for the sake of survival as the Kyuubi container rushed through the streets with the might of a thousand men!

**"DEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNAAAAAA!!"**

"Deina" in the meantime chuckled. His little game with the kyuubi was proving to be more fun than expected! He narrowed his unseen eye in excitement. Reminding himself that he still needs to get Naruto to trust him completely, he recalled every single event that has happened. Yes, every single little jerk of clumsiness had a reason... To gain Naruto's trust. Even that silly little kiss held the purpose to drop the Genin's guard... And there was a bit of something that he didn't count on at all... The enjoyment of such.

**'Is everything going according to plan, Deidara?'**

"Hai, Leader-sama. Hmph. It's all going well, yeah." He answered while hiding in a secluded part of the forest. He glance up at the treetops, the sun's rays shimmering through the branches... No wonder Konoha is widely visited. He chuckled a bit hearing the Genin's loud bellow. "You'll soon have the ninth Jinchuuriki... Yeah."

**'How long do you suppose before you can capture him?'**

"With any luck within this month, un."

**'Good. Currently, I've sent Sasori and Tobi off to Suna to retrieve the one tailed bijuu.'**

"Tobi? Why him? I thought he's just an Akatsuki-member-to-be?"

**'While it is true, I can't have Sasori roaming about without a partner, thus I temporarily enlist Tobi. The reason why you are there in Konoha without one is because this is a mission you requested yourself. No help, remember?'**

"Hai, Hai." Deidara said tiredly. "I know, un."

**'Good. I expect a report soon.'**

With that, the link was cut and Deidara placed the hat back on. Wiggling because of the large brown overcoat that he wore that was uncomfortable, he leapt back up to the rooftops of Konoha buildings. From there, he spotted the sad Genin walking pathetically into the training grounds.

Smirking in his hat, he was just about to leap down to molest- er, hug the boy when out of nowhere (so it seems) a guy came rushing toward the said blond. Deidara narrowed his eyes and stealthily whooshed over to some nearby bushes. _'Hm... And just who is he?_'

* * *

Naruto turned his head sadly, then widened his eyes at the sight. "Eeh? Neji? What are you doing here?"

"Saw you moping around. The others forced me to come here for something." Neji answered blankly with a stoic annoyed face.

See, what happened was that Naruto practically tore down the ramen shop in his sorrow to find Deina, but alas, no such luck. The other Chuunins gathered round and discuss the weirdness of Naruto being so glum. It was then given a vote as to who should cheer him up. Unfortunately, that person was Neji.

Naruto stared in dismay. "And you're telling me all this?!"

Shrug. "You needed to know the truth." The long haired boy then looked toward the other. "So what's wrong?"

The blond bit his lip in hesitation. Did he really want to tell Neji that he was ACTUALLY having trouble with his MISSION? He shook his head. "Iie. I can handle it." He murmured looking to the ground.

Neji wrinkled his brow. "What do you mean, Naruto?" The Jounin leaned over the Genin, trying to recieve a clear answer. Their faces were close, blue eyes meeting pale.

Unfortunately, what could a have been a picture perfect yaoi moment for NejiNaru lovers was interrupted by a huge brown happy package!

"Uuuun!" Deina cried happily as he hugged his friend. Indeed was he happy to find him.

"D-Deina?!"

"Un!" said the guy bobbing his head up and down.

"Where were you?!" Naruto cried in relief hugging the other tightly.

"Un!"

"I don't know what that means, but I don't care! I finally found you!"

Neji stared. "Don't you mean he found you?"

Those words hit the Genin hard on the head.

"Who is he anyway?"

"Huh? Uh nothing! Just my mission! I have to find this guy-" Naruto's voice trailed off in realization. Oh yeah! He had to find Deina's soulmate! Ignoring Neji entirely and not noticing Deina's snickers, He grabbed the guy and ran off in persuit of another girl.

Neji blinked before closing his eyes. Too much angst totally isn't good for a guy.

* * *

"Okay Deina, Now's the time that you find the date you deserve." Naruto said flatly.

Deina opened his arms out indicating for a hug. "Un!"

"No! Not me, you need a girl!"

Cursing inwardly, Deina kicked the ground. "Un."

"Anyway, according to your profile, you could find a girlfriend in..." He stared at the survey. "Ino!" Snickering inwardly, _'Perfect! Now he won't go after Sakura-chan!_'

"Un!" A flapping noise was made as he shook his head like a dog.

"Oh grow up already, Deina! How do you know you'll hate her if you don't try?" Naruto grinned and pushed Deina towards the blond's house. "Just leave all the arrangements to me! Don't worry, I'll be there to help!"

Deina gulped a bit. As soon as they've reached the shop, he whipped around and jumped into Naruto's arms. "UUN!" He yelled in fear.

"Now don't be a chicken!" Naruto chirped as he pushed Deina to the door. Ringing it, Naruto grinned.

Upon opening the door, Ino swished her hair slightly at the sight of them. "Can I help you?"

"Hi Ino! Can you do me a favor and go out with him? He really needs a date from a really pretty girl, and you're just the one!"

Ino stared at Deina. She stared at his straw hat. She stared at the brown cloak. She stared at the dirt. She stared at the flies buzzing. She then blinked. Before she could say no, a certain lazy Chuunin with certain sand nin girl walked by talking animatedly. Her inner fire then bursted.

Deina stared as the girl suddenly latched on his arm. "Suuure!" She gushed, gazing at the couple angrilly. The poor guy sweatdropped at the syrupy thick tone of the blonde. "Un?"

"Ehehe! Well, no time like the present! Off to your date!" Naruto exclaimed pushing the two... It was perfect, fine even... But at that moment, time seemed to have frozen. A voice husky and low whispered in his ear, "I don't like it that you keep pushing me away..."

Before the Genin could find out who it was, Deina and Ino were already on their date. He blinked a little nervous. What in the world was that? He scratched the back of his neck worried.

* * *

The setting for lunch was ironically the same place that Shikamaru and Temari chose to eat. Ino scooted real close to Deina, every once in a while glancing back at the other group for signs of discontent. She closed her eyes shut. _'Okay Ino! You can do this!_'

"Heeey, you!" She said happily.

"Un?"

"Oooh, say that again, it's so sexy!" Ino said.

"Un?"

"Oh yeeeaaaah..." Ino quickly whipped her head toward Shikamaru and Temari, who were still talking. They seemed quite uninterested in what Ino's doing._ 'Darn it!_'

Meanwhile, Deina was sweatting Niagra. What the heck is this girl doing? Doesn't she know that he has to get back at the Jinchuuriki as soon as possible? But seeing as how she keeps looking at another group, he then understood.

She had a motive to keep the two from talking together for some reason.

Deina frowned. "Un."

Ino whipped her head around. "Hmm? Oh sorry, just play along for a little bit longer, okay?" She patted Deina's back, then drawing circles. Her voice grew seductive, yet loud enough for the two to hear. "It's been a while since we've been like this, honey..."

Shikamaru glanced at their direction questioningly. What's Ino doing with that guy? Whatever, it's troublesome. He then stood. "We'll have to talk with the Hokage about this."

"Yes. If what the information says is true, then there really is an intruder." Temari then joined the shadow nin to the door.

_'Oh no you don't!_' Thought Ino. Grabbing Deina, she yanked the poor man over towards the entrance nearby. "Why don't we move it up to the next level?" Although Ino did not intend to do anything rash, Deina got scared.

"Uuuuun!" He waved his arms wildly.

Ino screamed as she caught a brief glimpse of what was inside the brown cloak. _'My... Hair... Stolen..._'

If she had actually analyzed carefully, Deina doesn't look like Ino a whole lot at all... But then, she passed out.

Deina stared in shock. "Un?"

"Ah, so troublesome." Shikamaru muttered carrying Ino out bridal style.

Temari then grinned at Deina. "Well, see you around! Hope your date went well for the most part." She then quickly left.

Deina frowned to himself. "Un."

"Oy Deina!!" cried the familiar blonde's voice. Naruto ran in just in time to see... No Ino. "Eh? Where did Ino go?"

Deina then tried to perform his civil duty by explaining everything to the Genin. "Un, un un, un un un un un un un, Uuuun, un un un un!" (Un! translator: Well, you see, I was dating Ino when, booom, she just fainted!)

"What?!"

"Un!"

"I said stop saying un, dattebayo!" A fist collided with Deina's poor forehead.

"Uuuuunnnn..." Deina sniffed. He then leaned close to Naruto.

"Huh? What is it?"

"Un."

"I have no idea what you've just said! Can't you speak anything OTHER than un?!" Naruto roared.

"Uuuuuuuuuuun!" Deina cried hugging Naruto tightly, as if saying, I'm sorry! Give me another chance!

"Okay, not Ino, then we're going to try someone else!"

Deina pointed at a nearby clock.

"Eh?! Your bed time already? But it's only noon!"

"Uun..."

"You take afternoon naps? What the heck?!"

Deina then led Naruto back to the hotel happily. "Un!"

"NO! I'm not going to watch you go to sleep, it's boring and it's stupid!" Naruto shouted. "Can't you at least try to get someone?"

"Un!" Deina shook his head.

"WHAT?! You're the one who made the mission in the first place! You wanted a freakin' soulmate, but who'd want a guy dressed up like that, who has curfew, afternoon naps, and only says UN?!" Naruto sobbed. "I'll never get it done!"

Deina patted Naruto on the back. "Un!" and he laid Naruto on the bed. He then walked to a cd player and pressed a button. Soft lulling music filled the air, soothing.

Naruto yawned as his eyes grew heavy. "Mmn? Deina... That sounds really nice..."

Deina sat next to the soon to be sleeping Genin. He was then surprised to find himself embraced.

"Deina... I hope we can become good friends... 'ttebayo..." With that the boy was asleep.

Deina stared for a moment, then took off his hat. "Well... Looks like I'm beginning to gain your trust... Heh." He then gathered up the Jinchuuriki into his arms... Whispering. "It won't be long before I have you... And you'll become mine... Un." He then licked one of the boy's whiskered cheeks slowly. "Huh. Have you been eating ramen while trying to find me? Figures." He turned Naruto's face towards him. "There will come a time when I show you my art... And when I do... You'll become... My masterpiece." And he sealed that promise with a soft kiss, so as to not awaken him. It was definitely a good thing that Naruto was such a deep sleeper.

* * *

Coral: And that's it for this chapter. If you guys see any mistakes, please point them out to me! Tell me what you think and what you like about this chapter!


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